Write a letter your cousin who found a job related to a technology industry in another country. Express him or her you are happy about it Tell him or her a new trend /technology in your life Ask from him /her how did find a job in that country and ask if him or her facing problems

#cousin #job #technology #industry #country #trend #life

Dear Mr Sean I am writing to express my feelings. You are working as a programist. I am so happy I can not describe it. I hope you are well done.

Firstly

, You are working in Germany. As I heard you are a computer specialist. I have dreamed since childhood. It is very difficult but you can handle it.

Secondly

, you should be made the best phone. Because many people want to use a mobile phone.

Therefore

, their relatives

working

Wrong verb form

work

show examples

in another country and they want to talk face-to-face. If you facing some difficulties and expensive taxes. You should be moved to Russia. Because

Russian

Correct article usage

the Russian

show examples

government supports many programs you can enhance your financial aspects. If you have no problem, you should stay in Germany. I look forward to receiving your prompt reply and I hope the letter finds you in the best spirit. Yours faithfully Mr Don

Submitted by saydusmonovasomiddin94 on Sun Mar 31 2024

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Tone

Try to maintain a consistent tone suitable for a personal letter; the use of formal titles like 'Mr Sean' and 'Mr Don' seems overly formal for writing to a cousin.

Structure

Include a clear introduction, development, and conclusion in your letter for better structure and flow.

Development

Ensure your ideas are fully developed in each paragraph, providing specific examples or details to support your points.

Task Achievement

You've expressed happiness about your cousin's job, which was a task requirement. Good job on fulfilling that aspect.

Organization

Your letter is sectioned into paragraphs, each touching upon different subjects which aids in readability and organization.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

148 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Write a letter your cousin who found a job related to a technology industry in another country. Express him or her you are happy about it Tell him or her a new trend /technology in your life Ask from him /her how did find a job in that country and ask if him or her facing problems

Word Count

Holding international games such as olympics is an exciting event. Some people think that it has positive effect, while others argue that it is a waste of money. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Information technology enable many people to do their chores outside their workplace (e.g at home or while travelling) do the benefits outweigh the disadvantages?

In some countries many young people choose to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

‘Everybody should donate a fixed amount of their income to support charity.’ How far do you share this viewpoint?

Modern technology is now very common in most workplaces. how do you think this had changed the way we work? Do you think there are disadvantages to relying too much on technology?